Taxi drivers grumpy workers?

A recent report shows that London Taxi drivers are Britain's grumpiest workers, according to a survey on Monday, while secretaries are the happiest.

The gloomy prospect of ferrying around strangers every day makes taxi-drivers laugh less than any other profession, according to the survey of 4 000 workers.

Drivers cited traffic jams, the rising cost of petrol, drunken passengers and frisky couples as reasons not to be cheerful.

Fitness instructors could lighten up too, with just 0.9% of them saying they enjoy a giggle in the gym.

Those in recruitment could also do with a good dose of humour, the survey said, as just 3.8% laughed regularly during the working day.

By contrast, 53.5% of secretaries said they laughed on a regular basis during a working day, with a quarter of those surveyed confessing that most of their amusement comes from watching the stressful lives of their disgruntled bosses.

Other workers scoring high on the laughter scale were, perhaps surprisingly, accountants - many of whom said they regularly played pranks or wound up their workmates to alleviate the daily grind - and teachers.

The results of the survey, conducted for comedy TV channel G.O.L.D. also revealed a correlation between laughter at work and days off taken sick.

The more we laugh, it seems, the less we skive.

Heroin courier taxi driver jailed

You never know what could be lurking in your cab. Customers leave all sorts of stuff and some of it is never claimed such as the taser gun that Bob found in his cab a while ago. If you missed that story then click HERE to read it on the blog.

The chances are that you don't know exactly what goods your passengers are carrying and if a customer asked you to deliver a package to an address then would you just do it or question what is in the package.

Read the latest taxi news below and ask yourself. What would you do if given a package to deliver. This story is slightly different in view of the fact the idiotic driver knew what he was carrying.


Heres the story from the BBC News website


A taxi driver who admitted carrying £200,000 worth of heroin to Scotland has been jailed for 32 months.
John Arnold, 45, of George Street, Whitefield, Manchester, was driving north on the A74(M) when police stopped him for routine checks near Lockerbie.
Officers noticed he was nervous and carried out a drugs search of his taxi where they found four packs of heroin.
At the High Court in Edinburgh, Judge Lord Brailsford described it as an "act of gross folly and stupidity".

The court heard how police officers stopped him on the motorway in the south of Scotland in August last year.
They noticed Arnold appeared nervous and was vague and evasive when he spoke to them.

They also spotted a carrier bag sticking out from beneath the front passenger seat and detained him for a drugs search.
Police officers found four packages wrapped in brown paper each containing a half kilogramme of heroin.
The haul was worth a maximum of £200,000 if broken down into street deals.
Arnold told police he was being paid £300 to bring the package north from his home city.
He admitted being concerned in the supply of the Class A drug on 21 August last year.
Arnold had previously been granted bail to allow him to have a knee operation.
Judge Lord Brailsford said he now had no choice but to jail him.
He said: "I am prepared to accept that this offence is out of character.
"I have no alternative but to impose a custodial sentence."
'Strong suspicion'
The judge said he would have jailed him for four years, but the sentence would be reduced following his guilty plea.
Defence counsel Frances Connor said Arnold ran an amateur football team and through that contributed to youth training in his local area.
She said: "It is clear he has disappointed many people by his appearance here today."
Ms Connor said that for several months Arnold had been transporting a man on local journeys who came to be a valued customer.
He was asked by the man to run him to Glasgow where he had "some business" and was offered cash payment for the trip.
However, when Arnold went to pick up the passenger he was told he could not go and would like him to take a package to Glasgow.
The defence counsel said: "He knew something was wrong.
"He had a strong suspicion about what he was being asked to do."

Penny Pinching

The majority of fares will pay what is on the meter and usually give you a tip. Sometimes big, sometimes small. It works both ways as if its say for example £1.90p on the meter the chances are the customer will give you £2 and say keep the change. If it says £2.10p on the meter then I will often say to the customer just give us £2 but this week I got one customer who I had been told was a bit tight and I didn't know whether to believe it or not so off we set on a short journey that was to be £2.25p on the meter.

The customer paid me using a £2 coin, a 20p coin and 3 2p coins totalling £2.26p. I took the money and out it away expecting him to get out the car but he sat there. I had a feeling he was waiting for his penny change so when I rummaged through my loose change and gave him a penny he then thanked me and got out of the car.

Prior to picking this person up I could see him feeding coins into a slot machine and losing.

Red-faced police crack mystery

|A recent news story in Ireland. Nothing to do with taxis but made me laugh anyway

Irish police chasing a Polish driver who had apparently committed more then 50 motoring offences have discovered the embarrassing truth.
Officers had been puzzled how the mysterious 'Prawo Jazdy' had always produced his documents - but with a different address each time.
However, they have now discovered that 'Prawo Jazdy' is Polish for driving licence, reports Metro.
An internal Garda memo, reported in Irish papers, said officers taking details of Polish traffic offenders had been mistakenly using 'Prawo Jazdy', printed in the top right corner of the driving licence, as the holder's name.
"Prawo Jazdy is actually the Polish for driving licence and not the first and surname on the licence," the police memo said.
"It is quite embarrassing to see the system has created Prawo Jazdy as a person with over 50 identities."
A Garda spokesman declined to comment on the reports.

Taxi-driver's own goal

A taxi driver unwittingly became the getaway driver for a thief who had just burgled his home.
Mr Shen, of Huainan city, picked up the passenger at a bus stop at around 3am, reports Xin'an Evening Post.
"He had a lot of home appliances, so I helped him put all of his things into the cab," he said.
"I noticed he had a fish without a tail, and I thought how much it looked like the fish in my freezer at home. But then I laughed at myself for even having the thought."
The passenger said he had just returned from a trip to his home town and had been dropped off by a long distance bus.
Mr Shen only realised the truth when he later returned home to find his house broken into and his possessions - including the tail-less fish - missing.
Police later arrested a 56-year-old man who faces charges of burglary and theft.

Sleep

Why is it that when people are so relaxed in a car that they fall asleep on the journey. It usaully happens with kids on long journeys. Maybe its the drone of the engine or something along those lines.

Its a totally differnt thing when you pick up one of the towns visitors to the local hostelry's and they`ve had a little too much to drink and are tired. Its a common occurance late at night that they will invariably fall asleep during the journey and the hardest part is trying to wake them.

Whats the best way to wake them and get the fare off them. I usually just shout loud or give them a dig but sometimes it doesnt work.

One guy I picked up this week was so tired and drunk that he managed to tell me where he wanted to be before falling asleep. When I got to his house I woke him. This was a major fete in itself as he seemed totally out of it. A shout, a dig, a poke and a prod woke him then it was the usualy 5 minutes of him going through his pockets so he could pay me. First off he offers to pay by Barclaycard. I couldnt accept this payment as we are not geared up for it but I did take a look at his card and note down his name should I have needed it for anything. He then pulled out a condom and offered me that. This was followed by a load of loose change amounting to 27p and 4 lollies which he tried to sell me as part of the taxi fare.

At this point I wasnt sure what I was going to do with him when his wife/partner came out the house and paid the fare and dragged him out of the car.

I wouldnt have liked to be him the next morning.

Bank Holiday Cruising

Its been a busy bank holiday weekend with the usual mixed weather but this didnt stop thousands of holiday makers enjoying Barrow and The Lake District as "The Tahitian Princess" Cruise Liner docked and welcomed American holiday makers to the town.


This meant plenty of taxis at the docks waiting for the passengers and taking them on a daily tour of such areas as Coniston and The Lakes as well as local historic places like Furness Abbey and a drive round the coast.

A great day out for the passengers and the drivers and no one lost out as even the drivers who stayed locally to pick up our regular fares were more than happy as it meant there wern't as many cabs in the town and therefore more work for the local lads

Responsible Adult

She was a young girl with a baby in a travel seat who got into the car. She opened the rear door. put the baby seat in the car complete with baby in it and then went round to the other side and got in the back seat and told me where she wanted to go to.

I asked her if she was going to strap the baby in and she said that she never does and it will be ok. I told her that its not ok, its dangerous if I pull up quick and its illegal. She then proceeded to strap the baby seat into the car and hadn't the faintest idea what to do. She had the child facing forward and didnt know how the seat belt attached to the baby seat. I had to sort it all out for her.

During the journey I asked if it was her child and how old it was. Yes, it was her child and it was 7 months old. Makes you wonder how a young mum can have a child of 7 months and have no idea how to fasten the child into a car safely. She told me she normally travels in her boyfriends car and the baby is never fastened in as its easier to get in and out the car but since she split from her boyfriend she has to get taxis.

Laziness is what it is, she puts the "cant be bothered strapping baby in attitude" before her childs safety. What sort of a mother is this.? I told her this as well. I don`t think she valued my opinion but she won`t ever travel in my vehicle without her baby being properly strapped in.

I doubt she would ever travel in my car again as she would be scared I`d have another go at her over safety of children.

Office staff safety

Its quite disturbing and quite common to hear of assaults on taxi drivers and very rare to hear of assaults on the taxi office staff but it does happen.

As a telephonist answering the phone to a customer, what would you do if they were abusive on the phone. As for me, I wouldnt send them a cab. If they are like that on the phone then what will they be like in the cab. Safety HAS to come first.

Here is one such story. [double click the image to view full size]


What do you think. Does the punishment fit the crime. We are trying to supply a public service. If it was a police officer that was assaulted then the culprit almost certainly would have been sent down so why not for this case. We are both serving the public.

The Long and Winding Road

Last weekend saw the annual Keswick to Barrow Walk. Now if you've never heard of this, it is a gruelling 40 mile sponsored walk raising money for charities whilst taking in some of the Lake Districts breathtaking scenary.


For us taxi drivers, we had to go and pick a few people up from the finishing post as they were too lame to walk anymore but the problem with any event like this is the amount of road closures. Actually, not so much the closures but more the parking and waiting restrictions meaning complete chaos if we went to the designated pick up point and the customer was too tired to walk to it.




Even so, it would have been a great day out for many and thousands of pounds would have been raised for various charities so well done to everyone who took part. The walk was open to everyone including disabled people and its good to see so many taking part as all proceeds will be split between many local charities.



I`ve only ever done the Keswick to Barrow once..... and that was in the car... Ho Hum...

Smelly food and wind

It was a windy day, not too windy as I picked a fare up from one of the many local fast food chains. She got in the car with her food and young son and as you know, the smell of this stuff tends to linger so down goes the windows a little bit to let some fresh air in.

Kids, being kids and having to play about, the litle boy decided to put the back window down and the wind started blowing in the car. The female passenger (who had rather long hair) told the young boy to put the window up, exclaiming and I quote the following, "Put that window up now, I've got hair all over my face".

The young boy calmly turned round to her and said "Why don`t you get a shave then"

Kids seem to say the funniest things.... and in all innocence

Wow!!! I`ve won car

This week or so the company has yet again excelled itself using advanced technology in a move up from the "Ringback" that we provided customers with. Instead of Ringback, our customers who call us using a mobile will get a "Textback".

So whats a Textback". In simple terms its a text telling the customer that their taxi is outside and the beauty of it is that the text also tells the customer what the make model colour and registration of the taxi is.

This has many benefits, It allows the customer to easily spot you, They and you know you have the right fare and car. The customer knows they are being picked up by the cab they ordered and not another one trying to steal the job.

On this one particular day, I picked a young girl up who told me that everytime she rang for a taxi she got sent a junk text message telling her she had won a car. She debated this with her boyfriend and each had thought the other had entered a competition and won a taxi cab.

I didnt realise people could be that thick. I wonder if she replied to the text to see if she really had won a prize.

Honestly. some people are only alive cos its illegal to shoot them. And its right what they say, "In every bunch of roses, theres always one prick".

A nice day out

This week gone I went to the train station to pick up a fare and assumed he was going to Eskdale Avenue in the town but it turned out he wanted to go to Eskdale in the Lake District so off we went and just over an hour later got him to his destination. We had a good chat on the way there and on the way back I was in no rush so had a run around the area and took in some of the sites for a hot summery day.

Not a bad day out. Could do with more of them. Get paid a taxi fare and enjoy yourself at the same time. Sounds good to me.

Pictures are of some of the scenic areas of The Lakes. As always, double click the image to view full size. The picture below shows Birker Fell and it does cut a bit of milage off your journey if you go over the top. What a view from the top...

Pinch Punch, 1st of the month

Its the first day of May meaning two bank holidays on the way. The first is this weekend and the next will be the last weekend of May. Hopefully this means a busy start and end of month but the bit in the middle is usually a quiet one.

As its the 1st May it got me thinking about where the saying "Pinch Punch, 1st of the month" comes from and what its all about. I did ask a few fares but I think they must have thought I was going senile as the majority hadnt heard of it and those that had, couldmt explain it.

Stupid Girl

More CCTV footage shows a girl standing in the middle of the road on her own making no attempt to move when she saw me. I had manoeuvre around her as she just stood there. Afterwards I stopped the car and could hear the conversation between her and a friend.

It appears that the young girl in the road (aged around 14) was arguing with her friend saying she wasn't going home and has had enough of life and was going to stay stood in the middle of the road and not move.

Shortly after, the young girl was dragged off the road and onto the pavement by her friend, then the young girl ran off with her friend chasing her.

No Food cos I said so...

Last night I picked up two girls from the local Chinese takeaway. One of them had food which was not wrapped up and I refused to take her unless she wrapped it up. I do have a sign saying no food and no drink to be carried open or consumed in the car but no one seems to take any notice.

She asked me why I wouldn't allow food in the car and I explained that if I pulled up quick due to some idiot stepping out in front of me then I would probably end up with curry all down the back of my neck. She insisted that she wouldn't spill it but I`ve heard it all before and stood my ground. She did eventually wrap it up but what annoys me is that if I was to do it in their car then they wouldnt like it. - No respect for property thats not their own.

On a serious note, if I was to have an accident and the food got spilt due to the accident and a passenger got scalded off it then would my insurance pay out. I doubt it. So there's another reason not to have food open in the car.

Lap of Luxury

The latest car to join our fleet at A1 83-83-83 is certainly turning a few heads.
Local taxi users just cannot believe it when this brand new Bentley look- a- like purrs to a halt outside to pick them up. Then when they step inside to a world of plush leather and walnut trim to be transported in the lap of luxury they are astonished.
One chap who had ridden in style the previous day told me, when I picked him up in my more mundane saloon that he couldn't stop smiling for the rest of his day.
Tony the colourful character who runs the big shiny beast tells me that it can be hired for any occasion. Weddings, nights out, birthdays, executive travel or even just to give your old mum a treat.

One extreme to another

Earlier today I picked up an elderly gentleman and took him to Walney Island (Not too far from Barrows Town centre). During the journey he was sick in the car. Not through drink or anything but he was genuinly ill. It wasn't a lot of sick and he said he couldnt afford the soiling fee and if I kept the meter running whilst he cleaned it up then he would pay the total on the meter.

I thought this would be a good idea as it saves him money, it was a genuine illness and not self inflicted through drink and I thought it would also save me the job of cleaning it up.

The elderly gentleman went in his house and came out with all sorts of cleaning stuff and set to work cleaning the mess up that he had made. Now bear in mind that it wasnt much and therefore shouldn't have took that long but by the time he had finished, the car on the inside looked the cleanest it has done in a long time. Not only had he cleaned the mess up but he had polished and waxed the interior trims and dashboard and made it smell really nice then opened the back doors and done them and wiped round the trims. I didn't ask him to do this but he said he felt bad about what happened and wanted to put things right.

I never expected this and after inspecting what he had done to clean the car and admiring his work I didn't have the heart to charge him the fare.

If only everyone else was like that.

Later on as day turned to night and the usual drunken idiots that cant handle their beer came out to play it was a different matter, violence, aggression and abuse were the order of the night but thats about the norm these days with these cretins that cant handle their beer

Hair raising

Quite often when the computers in our cabs give us a job to do we will find that the persons name is spelt wrong usually due to the operator mis-hearing the customer or a case of bad spelling and so this week I got a job at a local hostelry to pick up someone by the name of "No hair".

I pulled up outside the pub and waited a moment when a guy asked me if the name was O'Hare. I quickly figured out that this was the correct fare and as he got in the car I couldn't help but notice he was totally bald. I rather quickly moved my data screen out of his view in case he thought someone was taking the mick out of him.

I`ve had some strange names come up on that screen in the past and some strange spellings. One that could have been embarrassing was the name MUFF. Turns out it should have been Murph.

Anyone else had any strange names????

A Stones Throw Away

Picked up a fare tonight and took her to where she wanted to go and on route I noticed a bunch of kids around 10 years old and as I went to drive past them they hurled stones and rocks at my car. My immediate thought was to stop the car and get out and deal with it but I know if I had done this then the chances are that I would have been arrested and so I left it and carried on driving as I knew in the back of my mind that passenger safety was my main concern.

I dropped my passenger off and checked the car for damage and couldn't see anything. I then set off back the way I came and these same kids were still there. I slowed right down and they must have thought I was going to stop as they legged it through some alleyways into a maze of flats.

These kids know they can get away with it as its not easy to catch them as they know the area very well. The police are never around when you want them and the big question is.. "What are these kids of around 10 years old doing out on the street at 10.30pm at night". Do their parents not care where they are and what they are up to.

Apparently its becoming a regular occurrence  Kids throwing objects and missiles at passing cars and buses and its happening all over.

Bus or taxi

Its a common scene where a person will come out of a pub and debate which is the quickest way into town. Maybe by bus as it may be cheaper but then you have to wait for the bus and stop at stops along the way. They could get a taxi and have a direct run to your destination.

The person decided to order a cab but whilst the cab is on its way to pick you up, the bus arrives so you jump on that and head off into town and cant be bothered to ring the taxi off to cancel the cab

Its a common scene and happens a lot locally, usually where there is a bus stop near to a pub or other venue.

It only takes a minute to cancel a taxi but they cant be bothered. The other thing is that people will wait for you to pull up outside their house before cancelling. Should they be made to pay a cancellation fee. After all, would you order a pizza delivery and wait for it to arrive then ring up and cancel the order.

Egg Record

Over the weekend I picked up a fare who had with him what must qualify as the biggest Easter egg ever to be carried in the boot(trunk) of a taxi. Sadly he wasn't willing to share the giant egg which he had won as a raffle prize. But he was generously delivering the big brown beauty to a kids party for the lucky brats to smash and devour. Sounds like my sort of game but unluckily I didn't get invited. A pity because I bet it was good to watch the kids having fun.

Mobile Cloakroom

It was a busy weekend just gone and two young ladies I picked up from one town centre pub wanted to go to another. The thing is that one of the young ladies had a jacket and she didn't want to take it in every pub with her and had the cheek to ask me to take it and drop it off at a house on walney for her tomorrow. I refused as I am not responsible for other peoples property, I am not a mobile cloakroom or is that slowly becoming part of the taxi drivers job description. Bloody cheek of it.

I got the impression that she just expected me to drop it off for her free of charge the next day but she was that drunk I doubt that she would even remember where she left her jacket when she takes it off in a pub later on in the night

Alone again Naturally.

Tonight I got a job to pick up a fare and so off I went to collect when 3 lads came out of a house and one of them was carrying a young girl who was so drunk that she probably wasn't aware of what was going on around her. One of the guys offered me £20 to take her home to Dalton (about 3 miles up the road) and knock on a door so someone could take her in the house.

I refused the job and said that I couldn't take her on her own due to a number of reasons. She may have been sick on the back seat was one thing that was going through my head but more importantly the thought of me taking a young girl who's totally out of it home could lead to any accusation being made and I didn't want to take that chance.

I know that the cab is kitted out with CCTV cameras but it still didn't make me think twice about this and I refused to take the fare. Who knows what innocent allegations could have been made.

As for me refusing to take her in this state then I think any other driver would have done the same

CCTV in the cab

On Boxing Day 2008 and I picked a fare up in Barrow Town Centre and took him to where he wanted to be and asked him for the fare of £5.40p. The guy was OK when he got in the cab but his attitude changed when he got home and he refused to pay the fare and threatened to "slice me up".

Naturally I was frightened and its not the sort of thing you should have to put up with in this job but unfortunately these days it seems to be part of the job description.

The thing is, If it wasn't for CCTV in the cab then this idiot may well have got away with this. I contacted the police and they took a statement and looked at the CCTV footage which they seized as evidence.

What do you think. Should all taxis be fitted with CCTV or is this an infringement of human rights and an invasion of privacy. The reason I ask this is that last weekend I had a young lad get in the cab and he asked if what he saw was a CCTV camera. I told him it was and he immediately told me that he didn't want to be on camera and to let him out the car. He did pay the fare but seemed reluctant to be on camera. Perhaps he had something to hide.

To me, Its my car and if I want to fit a camera in it and film then I should have every right to do so and if passengers dont like the idea of themselves being on camera then thats their problem. They have the choice. They dont have to travel in the cab. I have signs in prominent places in the vehicle stating that CCTV is recording images for safety.

Read the full story about the taxi court case below. Double click to enlarge

Russell (Barrows Dog Walking Legend)

Every Taxi Driver in Barrow knows of the local legend that is Russell Thompson. Russell can be seen at almost anytime of day or night walking dogs through the streets of Barrow and usually he will stop and chat with the taxi drivers and their fares and is a well known local legend in the town so whilst chatting to him this week I find him very upset and a bit down with himself. It appears that his dog (The one in the photo) had died peacefully in its sleep. It was quite an old dog. He is upset about it.

For those that dont know Russell, he is Barrows very own dog walking Legend and theres plenty about him on the internet. Hes on myspace and facebook and has lots of fans and is well known locally. Russell is also famous for appearing on my radio shows in the past.

A Walking. talking History Book

One thing I love about the Furness area is its history which is so varied as it covers a massive area and those best at teaching history are those that have been around the longest and that's our dear old folk that we pick up.

They have stories of good and bad times about how life used to me and I`m always intrigued by how they got by years ago and I suppose when I get to their age then the next generations will be asking how we managed to survive. Its an evolutionary thing and we get used to what we grow up with and what we have.

Anyway, today I picked up an old lady who tells me she is 82 years old and we talked about tales of the war and living in poverty and rations. At the end of the journey she didn't want to get out the car without putting the world to rights and even though we were busy with jobs, I didn't want her to get out the car til she was ready so we sat and had a 10 minute talk.

Some of these people are widows or widowers and long for a bit of company and its really re-assuring knowing that not only have you got them home safely but you have also made their day and they've had someone to share their life's story with.

Late for a night out

Picked up 3 girls who were all dolled up ready for a girly night out on the town and as I set off into town the girl sat in the front seat pulled down the sun visor so she could use the mirror to apply some lipstick.

It was at this point that I couldnt help but go on and off the brake pedal ever so slightly and watch her miss her mouse and get it all over her face.

Cruel or what!!!!. And whilst i`m on the subject. Why do they call it lipstick. It doesnt stick their lips together. Pity!!!!!

Locked in

Having being sent to an address this week with another driver to pick up a fare we realised it was a 2 car booking as there was 8 people. That's easy said one person. 4 people in each car.

Not a problem, so the first car sets off with four people in and I set off with only 3 people in not thinking anything of it. We got about half a mile down the road when one young lady piped up saying that there was a spare seat in the car and that we had left someone behind.

I turned the car around and set off back to the house where I picked up from only to find the girl in the back saying. "Oh gawd! I`ve locked her in the house." She had not realised she had come out and locked up with someone still in the house

Guest Blogger

Well since I seem to find myself busy with other things and don't get the time to update the blog, I think a guest blogger would be more than welcome to fill my size eleven boots for a while. So folks a big welcome to local celebrity and well known radio DJ cum Taxi driver Bill Clark.
Come on bill lets hear whats been going on whilst you have been out and about on the highways and byways of this corner of the UK.

Box Cab

Spotted in Benin West Africa this weekend on the road from the Burkina Faso border down to the port capital of Cotonou, Benin, : a car carrying a handmade coffin which was crafted to resemble a taxi cab. Presumably, this bespoke box was to be the final resting place for a taxi driver who perished. It is customary in some West African cultures to create coffins that call to mind some aspect of the deceased's life or work. Not everyone there gets buried in a customized coffin like this, but it is a sort of regionally specific popular art form. There is a phone number on the side but please don't call it. The guy's not gonna answer, and it might ring one of his survivors, which would be mean and rude.

Feathered Fare

Ive learnt that sometimes it's best not to ask whats in boxes when folk load them into the boot.
But the strange noises coming from a box that a passenger gently placed in my trunk today got my curiosity aroused. During the ride I asked about the strange clucking noises coming from the boot but my amused fare wouldn't tell what was in the box until we reached our destination.
Lifting the box out of the boot he took the cover off to reveal a pair of plump chickens. After I had snapped a photo of our feathered travelling companions I suddenly thought about the fate of the hapless pair, and said that I didn't want to be the one delivering them to their eggsacution. But my fare assured me that the birds weren't due for the chop just yet and were to be kept for their eggs.

Clamped Cab

A local cabbie come back to his car which had been left untaxed on Barrows Cavendish Street and found that he had been clamped. Just goes to show that you can't get away with it nowadays.
The car in question is not one of our firms by the way, but a frantic check was carried out to make sure that all the fleet were up to date with tax was started straight away.

Woolies Window

Here in Barrow we had an old saying, usually said by folks who earnestly believed that they were in the right. The saying went "if that's true I'll show my arse in Woolworths window" or "if I don't keep my promise I'll show my bum in Woolworths window."
Well I guess that now that Our 99 year old Woolworth store on the Main Shopping street is finally closing it's doors (and windows) for good, folks are having to rush in there to fulfill their promise. Look closely at the photo of the storefront!

Seasons Greetings

Hi Folks! Sorry to have been neglecting you for such a long while but I have been busy with other things. I seem to have hoodwinked myself into the management side of the taxi business and boy does it keep me busy! I have been spending less time out on the streets and as a result don't get to spend as much time gathering tales about our wonderful local characters. Bill another local cab-driver sent me this photo of "our Molly" who is without doubt the favorite fare of every local taxi driver. It seems that Molly is also a bit special to the many local town centre shopkeepers and market stallholders that she visits every day. They treat her like royalty and even took the time to decorate her much needed walking frame with sparkling Christmas decorations. If you look closely at the photo you may just notice that the twinkle in our Molly s eyes outshines the brightest tinsel. Things should quieten down in January and so I hope to be posting a bit more often then. Meanwhile compliments of the season and best wishes to everyone, and for those of you that have sent comments asking after me, sorry for not getting back sooner and thanks for the concern.
Cheers folks!

Cheeky Muppet

Some sneaky varmint in Germany is driving a car built for UK roads and has installed a Muppet in the passenger seat. The speed cameras in Germany are made to take photos of drivers who sit in the left side of the vehicle, so drivers of UK cars which are right hand drive can't be easily identified. A German police source said: “The number plate is not enough. We need clear evidence of who is driving the vehicle too."
“But because this is a British vehicle we can never get a decent picture. The driver has obviously worked this out because he has placed a large puppet in the passenger seat.“This may be an example of the famous British sense of humour but it is still dangerous driving. The driver has been caught on camera on several occasions and the puppet is on the passenger seat every time. We suspect he positions the toy deliberately before accelerating past the camera.”

Die Hard

Sometimes when you get a funny noise coming from under the car its best just to ignore it and it will go away. But then again sometimes it won't eh?

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

X-FACTOR

Lately Saturday nights have been turning out to be a little bit on the quiet side, so what’s going on? Is it the so called credit crunch or even as some believe the start of a full blown recession. Well I don't think so myself I put the blame fairly and squarely on ITV. They are stealing the peak Saturday night trade away from the pubs and clubs and more importantly from the taxi trade. Saturday night from 8pm until 11pm is dominated by that popular cult TV show the X-Factor. Why I don't know because I don't watch it, but on Saturday night it dominated the conversation of the fares I picked up, some of whom were actually going to X-Factor parties. What that involves, I don't have a clue but it sure seems popular. Even worse news was told to me by one fan that was dashing between two x-factor parties; apparently the series lasts right up until near Christmas. Why can't these TV companies be made to show this stuff during the week instead of wrecking the whole country’s night time economy?

One interesting snippet that I did get told on Saturday night from a reliable source fascinated me no end. The new club which is due to open shortly, CLUB-M has been fitted with a new entrance solely for the use of the local emergency services. This I am told is so paramedics can attend to injured or ill folk and cops can remove troublemakers all without going through the crowded club. But the best bit is that the club has actually got its own padded cells to detain folk and prevent them from injuring themselves or others. The polite name they tell me is the detention or holding area. But a cell is a cell to me and I wonder is it legal, can they actually detain someone against their will? Would it not be false imprisonment, is it a step too far?

Lost Doggy

A rather mysterious large bulky brown envelope arrived at out taxi office this week. At first we were a bit nervous about opening it because of the strange shape that could be felt inside. When we finally decided that it probably wasn't a bomb our brave boss felt inside the package. He went a shade paler when he felt something slightly furry. But taking a deep breath he fearlessly hauled the unknown beast out of it's hiding place and we were confronted with a small version of the nodding dog mascot which you see on some folks car parcel shelves. Attached was a handwritten note which reads "This belongs to one of your drivers. Sorry!" So far he or she hasn't been claimed by any of our drivers and rumours are rife about the adventures of the lost doggy. Has a dog napping taken place, and the villain had a twinge of conscience? Has someone picked up the wrong dog by mistake or maybe a child took a fancy to our driver’s lucky mascot. The lost doggy is being held to ransom by the boss until the £1:50p shortfall that wasn't paid on the postage is handed over.

WWW,,,,what?

This one although American is just as relevant over here at the moment.