Wednesday, December 31

Sex Talk

How many other people can say that a perfect stranger has got into their car and within five minutes ends up talking explicitly about sex
This happened to me on a dull wet morning recently,the passenger was a perfectly respectable middle aged lady who some how got on to the subject of how young people are too open about sex and that people of her generation just don’t talk about it.
But she then went on to mention prostitutes, transsexuals, gays and extra marital affairs, all within a short ten minute journey. I don't suppose she would do the same with a bus driver or a shopkeeper but with us cabdrivers it seems anything goes.
I used to find it strange but nowadays nothing surprises me eh!

Friday, December 19

Black Eye Friday 2014

Way up here in this part of the North of England, we tend to call the last Friday before Christmas “Black Eye Friday.”
 It's the day most people finish work for the Christmas holidays and they tend to finish work early about lunch time and they then head straight down to the pub for a long boozy session.
 I find it amusing when it gets to about four o'clock in the afternoon I then start to pickup some of the less hardened boozers when they have had enough and want to go home.  Lots of them are then telling me what a good night they have had; they are convinced that because it's dark that it must be very very late at night. I never tell them any different and just drive them home.
 Once a year drunks I call them the very worst kind of drinker because they just aren't used to it, give me a seasoned drinker anytime.  They take ages to come out of the pub shaking hands, hugging everyone in sight, and then going back into the pub several times for yet more emotional farewells. Then once you get them into the taxi, the struggle is then to get them out of the taxi at the other end, because you are, their new very best friend in the whole wide world and they want to tell you their life story many times very very slowly and emotionally. Then its handshakes and if I’m very unlucky big bear hugs, but of course none of my new found best friends ever recognise me ever again.
Still it's all good sport, Merry Christmas and a happy new year. 

Wednesday, December 17

Ould Pearls

I was talking to an old lady of about eighty today whom I had picked up in the taxi, when she used an expression I had never heard before, and definitely never by a respectable old lady.
 She said” I have just had visitors and I was a bit embarrassed because my house is as messy as a whore’s garret”  Some of the stuff that older folk come out with never ceases to amuse and amaze me. One old guy who I had picked up going to an old friend's funeral come out with the classic line "Aye I would rather go to a good funeral then a bad wedding." another one he used was "it's as cold as me mother in law's kiss"
But the one common ould folk saying that I hear far to often is "Don't get old it's terrible" so my standard reply to that one is "maybe so but I don't like alternative" I will have to keep my ears open for any more of these pearls of ould folk wisdom and jot them down maybe.