Friday, July 31

EGGstremely Dangerous

This week has been a very distressing week for some of our drivers. For no apparent reason one driver had his vehicle door kicked in by some drunken yob who thought it was funny and a good laugh just to jump up at it and kick it.

His excuse would probably be that he was drunk and didn't know what he was doing but the next lot of idiots weren't drunk so what would their excuse be.

These idiots were driving round in a car. Speeding round and screeching the brakes as boy racers tend to do without showing any respect for other road users. The passenger in the car had eggs with him and was throwing them at passing vehicles.

One egg hit our drivers windscreen and you can imagine the force. If our driver is travelling at 25mph and the idiots in the other car throwing eggs were going at 40mph in the other direction then thats a combined force of 65mph when the egg hits the windscreen and splatters all over it blocking our drivers view and therefore potentially leading to an accident.

The police dont seem to do anything about it and cars remain damaged and egged and these idiots get away with it. What sort of a kick do they get from it.

End of Rant....

Tuesday, July 28

Split Personalities

This week I picked up a guy who was really very loud mouthed, drunk and stunk of stale cigarette smoke. He told me all about how he had got into a fight as he had been causing some trouble and how he made it out that it wasnt his fault. Anyway, I took the guy to his home address and dropped him off and thought no more about it.

Lets move forward about 36 hours.. I get a call to go to an address to pick a fare up. The same address I dropped this obnoxious lout off at 2 nights ago. Out he comes and gets into the car. Very smartly dressed in suit and tie and asked me to take him to his place of work. This same man was of a different character. He was polite and even gave a tip on the fare. He tells me he works for a local bank and has a wife and 2 children and that his wifes been ill. I couldnt believe it was the same person I picked up a couple of days ago.

I then brought the subject up of his night out and what an idiot he was acting. He went a deep shade of red and apologised to me for his behaviour but lets face it. We don't expect this sort of behaviour from someone in such a high stranding trustworthy job.

There are a lot of Jekyll and Hyde type characters out there and we meet them all the time. At night after having a few beers they pluck up the courage to start trouble but during the day they wouldn't say a word.

Saturday, July 25

Voicemail Gadget

Picked as fare up earlier this week and he proceeded to tell me all about his mobile phone and how the voicemail on it no longer works. Before I could say anything, he then went on to tell me that he had dropped the phone and the voicemail hasn't worked since and do I think that he may have broke his voicemail.

Are some people really this thick. I did suggest to him to take his phone to pieces and give it a shake and see if there was a small chip in there that spoke when he touched it and if there was then he has to take it to the local phone shop and ask them to put his voicemail back in his phone as it had fell out.

Wonder if the idiot really did go to a mobile phone shop.

Whilst on the journey he asked me what I knew about CD players as all his CDs were jumping. I suggested he needed a new stylus for it (like they used to have for playing records). I wonder what the store staff will think when he asks for a needle for a CD player.

Maybe I shouldnt wind the passengers up but some really do ask for it.

Thursday, July 23


You may remember a story about an aggressive taxi fare on Boxing Day last year where the passenger was arrested and charged. Full details HERE.

The incident happened on Boxing Day, The court case was 13th January 2009 and the outcome was a 4 month curfew and £100 compensation payable to me.

6 months down the line and I still havnt received a penny of it so today I telephoned the magistrates court and was told that this person has a lot of previous convictions and is paying off previous fines and compensation. The courts have confrimed that his last fine was paid off last week and they have now sent him a "means Test" form. This will allow the magistrates to assess how much compensation a week he can pay me.

Its just so annoying to be a victim of crime and be left out of pocket all this time. What is the point of compensation being awarded if the defendant cant pay and even if paid then getting a few quid per week isnt beneficial.

This sends out the wroing message to the criminal as they know that any fine they get can be paid weekly or monthly and they probably wont miss it. What sort of deterrent is that?

Tuesday, July 14

Taxi for one person

Part of the job description being a taxi driver is having to put up with the drunks and other idiots that we get in the cab but this week I just couldn't believe it when a passenger got in the cab and told me where he wanted to go. Seeing the meter start on £1.50p on tariff 4 he thought I was ripping him off and told me that the meter said I was charging him for 4 people. I did try to explain that the number 4 was the tariff number and not the amount of people in the cab.

He insisted that I turn the meter off and set it to number 1 for 1 person. (Tariff 1 is more expensive than tariff 4) but he's the customer and the customer is always right (do they still say that).

I put the meter on number 1 as he requested. It started at £2.00p and he never queried the extra 50 pence difference. He was just quite happy to see the number 1 on the meter thinking it meant one person.

At the end of the short half mile or so journey he paid the fare of £2.20p, gave me a £5 note and told me to keep the change.

You just cant understand how some peoples brains function.

Saturday, July 11


Bingo must be a very popular game among both old and young as we pick up all walks of life from the sad pathetic chavs to the old age pensioners that like to while away a few hours of the day playing their favorite game.

Some people go to pass a few hours during the day for a little fun. Others take it more seriously and go to gamble their money with a chance of winning and others virtually live in the bingo halls spending money day and night.

After the game of bingo, the taxi driver will wait to pick the fare up and the fare on most occasions will see the taxi driver waiting and keep us waiting whilst they feed the rest of their money into slot machines hoping to make a big win.

The chances are they will come out and get in the cab and say they didnt win and have a moan about why they bother going and that theu`ve spent all their money and so this leads to a situation earlier this week when I picked up a young chav from the bingo. She saw me waiting but kept feeding more and more coins into a rather hungry looking slot machine and shouting abuse at it. Shortly after she came out and attempted to light up what seemed the end of a cigarette, took 2 puffs then threw it down on the floor and then got in my car.

In true Jeremy Kyle chav style she said "Didnt win again, dunno why I bother, its good fun though innit, i need a drink, sort of... take me to the Barrow Arms innit"

After translating this I made the journey of less than half a mile and she was telling me how good she was at playing bingo and hardly ever lost. Its a game of skill she said, you have to have an idea of what numbers are going to come up..

Game of SKILL..... Its balls coming out of a machine at Random.. She wasnt happy when i told her this. I went on to say that there's no skill in bingo. Its numbers at random being drawn and marked off on a card. How can that be skilful.

She wasn't happy when I pointed out that bingo was just like the lottery. Its a gamble. You pay your money and you either win or lose. There's no skill.

At the end of the short journey she had the cheek to say that the taxis are too expensive and take up all her money. This sad pathetic whimp of a chav had just spent a fair few quid in the bingo, is now off to the pub to spend probably a lot more and she whinges about the taxi fare.

Think I`ll put the lottery on tonight. If I do it a set way, maybe I will win... I think not. Its all totally RANDOM.

Now lets see how many bingo players I`ve upset.

Monday, July 6

Found Property

First fare of the day and I picked up a young girl and took her to an address on Walney Island. She duly paid the fare and got out of the cab and I drove off.

Shortly after, the office called me on the radio and asked if I had found anything on the back seat as the girl I had dropped off had lost something. I wasnt aware of what it was that she lost til I turned round and had a look. Maybe its just me but at a very quick glance it looked like a long haired rat and so I dived out of the car and was about to shut the door when the office radio'd to me saying it was a hair extension.

I suppose I should have looked more carefully rather than just glance but its made me more wary of what goods people carry in the cab.

Go on, laugh at my expense. looking at it, it looks nothing like a rat but at the time I thought it was something sinister and you never know if there`s teeth hiding under any hairy thing that could jump up and bite....... :)