Magic Roundabout

As usual this morning a bit of road rage was going on at our famous Tesco magic mini roundabout. 

When I reached the roundabout I heard the screech of brakes and saw the usual macho shaking of fists and posturing, and I could hear the two drivers shouting and abusing each other.
 In the end one of the drivers screeched off in a cloud of tyre smoke. Unfortunately for him this was witnessed by a policeman in a plain car and he followed him. When I passed he and the P.C. were having words but I was disturbed to see a boy of about seven or eight sat in the front seat of the car. Its bad enough acting in this way anyway but to let a child witness it is truly moronic. 
The approach to our magic roundabout is the one place in Barrow I would consider speed humps. There is this unfounded faith in the idea that the faster and more aggressively you drive at it the better and that everyone will automatically give way to traffic from the right. This and the assumption that every driver will indicate are often proved wrong.
 Or do they just hope that everyone else has brakes and insurance.

EGGstremely Dangerous

This week has been a very distressing week for some of our drivers. For no apparent reason one driver had his vehicle door kicked in by some drunken yob who thought it was funny and a good laugh just to jump up at it and kick it.

His excuse would probably be that he was drunk and didn't know what he was doing but the next lot of idiots weren't drunk so what would their excuse be.

These idiots were driving round in a car. Speeding round and screeching the brakes as boy racers tend to do without showing any respect for other road users. The passenger in the car had eggs with him and was throwing them at passing vehicles.

One egg hit our drivers windscreen and you can imagine the force. If our driver is travelling at 25mph and the idiots in the other car throwing eggs were going at 40mph in the other direction then thats a combined force of 65mph when the egg hits the windscreen and splatters all over it blocking our drivers view and therefore potentially leading to an accident.

The police dont seem to do anything about it and cars remain damaged and egged and these idiots get away with it. What sort of a kick do they get from it.

End of Rant....

Cheeky Muppet

Some sneaky varmint in Germany is driving a car built for UK roads and has installed a Muppet in the passenger seat. The speed cameras in Germany are made to take photos of drivers who sit in the left side of the vehicle, so drivers of UK cars which are right hand drive can't be easily identified. A German police source said: “The number plate is not enough. We need clear evidence of who is driving the vehicle too."
“But because this is a British vehicle we can never get a decent picture. The driver has obviously worked this out because he has placed a large puppet in the passenger seat.“This may be an example of the famous British sense of humour but it is still dangerous driving. The driver has been caught on camera on several occasions and the puppet is on the passenger seat every time. We suspect he positions the toy deliberately before accelerating past the camera.”

Teen Racers

After watching yet another near pile-up involving one our local teen racers today, I really do think it's time for a rethink.

 Nowadays you just can't deny the fact that the roads are far busier and much more dangerous than ever before. In most cases seventeen is too young of an age to be let loose with a loaded weapon like a souped up car. Modern cars are much faster and more powerful than at any time ever before and I for one think that they shouldn't be used as kids toys.

 Far too many kiddie winkles are tearing around the town like lunatics in high performance cars foolishly financed by credit happy parents hoping to keep up with the Joneses.

 The depressing annual death toll can only be reduced by changing the law to reflect the clear fact that teenagers are far more likely to die in a car accident than any other way.

 In my opinion teens should be limited to unmodified restricted performance cars. And since most fatal teen accidents tend to happen at night and involve cars carrying more than three passengers lets change the law to restrict teens to carrying only one passenger after 9pm.

Bait Car

A Canadian meth addict steals a bait car which has cctv installed. Wow I wonder if the guy is crazy to start with or is it the meth that makes folk that aggressive. I sure wouldn't like to pick him up as a fare.

Granny Wars

Two grandmothers on mobility scooters had to be dragged apart after getting into a fight where they were "ramming each other like dodgems" in a supermarket.

The women were separated after they started trading blows in front of shoppers in an aisle of the Iceland store in Crawley, West Sussex.

They were prized apart after staff heard screams.

A store worker said: "It was shocking.

"Seeing these two old ladies going for each other like that was truly disturbing."

The shelf-stacker, who did not wish to be named, added: "They could have been seriously hurt - they were ramming each other like dodgems."

Cops were called to the scene after the warring pensioners - who were pals - fell out over money.

They arrested one of the pensioners, who has not been named, on suspicion of assaulting the other 78- year-old woman who suffered an injury to her arm. She was later taken to hospital.

The grand-daughter of one of them said: "The two of them met some months ago and this lady was always at grandma's house.

"They became really friendly but fell out massively over money."

It is not yet known whether charges will be brought.

It is not the first time mobility scooters have been used dangerously.

In Rugby, Warwickshire, the policy introduced a speeding clampdown on mobility scooters, which can reach a top speed of 8mph, after a series of collisions and near misses in the town centre.

Movie Muppets

I picked up a chap this week that had been forced to use a taxi, because he had had his pride and joy car stolen and crashed recently. His motor, he told me had been found wrecked and would probably be a total write off.
 But even he, the unlucky victim had to laugh as he told me how the police had caught the car thieves to blame. 
 After dumping his wrecked car they had gone on to attempt to pinch another motor but were interrupted by the local cops. The boys or girls in blue happened to have the good sense to check out the mobile phones that the gang were carrying. Lo and behold the clowns had actually filmed each other breaking into and driving away several more cars. 
A whole series of Barrow's car crimes were solved at a single stroke by the video evidence kindly provided by the daft bunch of movie making muppets.

Jet Pack

How about one of these strapped onto your push bike. It's a 50lb thrust pulse jet engine. The 140 decibel clatter tube is capable of propelling a bicycle and rider up to 75 MPH. Rather you then me, but if you are the daredevil type it is available now on E-Bay current bids stand at $650.

Telsa Electric Car

This is the Tesla Roadster. 100% electric, 0-60 in 4 seconds, 130mph top speed, no clutch and instant torque, equivalent to 135mpg, 200 plus miles per battery charge. But the bad news is that the price tag is about £45K - £50K and there is a long waiting list,so get your name down now. Congestion Charge free as well - for now. I don't think it would be too practical as a cab maybe but still I can dream.

Eco Friendly Bikes

They say that the hydrogen powered car for everyday use is twenty to forty years away yet.
But in the next year or so hydrogen fuel cell powered motorbikes and scooters will be on the market. Some will be a hybrid of electric and hydrogen but will still have zero emissions. Pity about the British weather, which unfortunately will be the biggest obstacle to sales over here.

Keswick to Barrow 08

We had the annual Keswick to Barrow walk on Saturday and again it seemed to be the biggest, best organized event yet. It always amazes me to see people arriving back after actually running the whole forty mile route. One tired walker I picked up later in the day had been to watch Barrow's triumph at the soccer match down in Burton and had not arrived home until 2am, and then had to rise at 4am for the start of the huge hike. He told me several folk had done this, wow what heroes they must be. What puzzles me is why the occasion doesn't seem to get more nationwide publicity, when you see the coverage given to events such as the London marathon, which at 26.22 miles is by comparison a stroll in the park. This hugely popular event brings in folk from far and wide, with local hotels all full and businesses benefiting by the cash the walkers spend. Maybe after the recent local elections some of the keen new faces will hopefully push to get the event promoted further afield. Many folk I took to cheer the walkers on told me "the atmosphere is fantastic for the crowd watching as well" so maybe it should also be promoted as a spectator event. Pity about the lack of a proper taxi pickup point again, it was a struggle to get anywhere near the finish point and the exhausted entrants had to walk even further to be collected.

” The Keswick to Barrow Walk is a 40 mile sponsored stroll through some of the country’s finest landscapes. The route starts on the southern side of the Lake District town of Keswick and winds its way through some of the most beautiful scenery to the Victorian town of Barrow in Furness on the coast of the Irish Sea.!

The idea of walking from Keswick to Barrow originated in 1966 as a result of a statement made by the late US President, John F Kennedy to the effect that "every American should be capable of walking 50 miles a day". At this time the first Polaris Submarine - HMS Resolution was being built at the shipyard in Barrow and several American experts were resident in the area assisting with the project.

With the idea now conceived, plans were soon under way to organise a walk and build relationships with the crew of the submarine and the workers at the then ‘Vickers’ shipyard. The initiative was taken by the Installation Manager (Submarines) to formally challenge the Commanding Officer of HMS Resolution to form a team and walk from Keswick to Barrow on 1st April 1967.”

Bent Bentley

Five police officers were injured when they crashed three patrol cars during a high speed chase with a £120,000 Bentley Continental stolen by three teenage joyriders. The supercar, which has a top speed of 195mph, careered off the road and flew through the air before coming to rest on its roof. Is it me or am I the only one thinking that a car with this sort of price tag, should have come with a foolproof anti theft system. Not only that just what does anybody need with a car capable of 195mph, we just ain't got the roads for it.

Hump Dodge

I wonder just how many tens of thousands of pounds have been wasted on new road humps recently installed on Barrows Holker Street. I say wasted because that's exactly what they have done with most of these shiny new humps. I wondered what was going on at first, was I getting paranoid? But no it seems that every time I drive down Holker, St random cars coming from the opposite direction will deliberately veer across the road, kamikaze style and head straight towards my cab. Had I upset someone, was there a reward for crashing into me? But no it seems that maybe some council bod has got his sums wrong and left just enough room in the middle of the road between the concrete humps for a car to pass, without it's occupants being shaken to bits by the bone shaking humps(comically they are actually called speed "cushions"). Barrow's local drivers will do anything to avoid the dreaded speed bumps, even playing chicken with each other and competing for who gets to the gap first. I wonder just how long it will be before these road humps, which are meant to prevent accidents are the cause of a collision themselves.

Birthday Biker

Early Sunday morning and one of my first fares stood waiting for me outside a vandalised phone box. Even from a distance and despite the fact that he was wearing civvies, I knew instantly that this guy was a biker. And when I say biker, I don’t mean one of the born again middle aged weekend warriers that we see on expensive Japanese super bikes at nearby Devils Bridge. This was one of the guys who live and breathe Harley, BSA, Norton and Triumph. Proper bikes they will tell you, for folk who don’t mind getting their hands dirty. He had a shaven head with a large tattoo covering most of his skull and should have looked kind of menacing, but the glum expression on his face told a different story. As we drove and chatted on the ten miles or so to his home he told me the story. It had been his birthday the day before and a big party had been arranged for the Saturday night. But sadly despite sending out dozens of invites not as many folk as he expected had turned up. By the time we turned into his street he was still a bit downhearted but putting on a brave face. As we neared his house I saw stood outside the meanest fiercest bunch of bikers you could imagine, all tattoos, chains, leather and oil stains. My first thought was “oh no this looks like trouble” but the huge grin which broke out on my fares face proved me wrong. The oil stained tattooed hands held out pretty pastel coloured envelopes and ribbon tied packages. It seems that some of his biker buddy’s had travelled many miles to bring him greetings cards and wish him a belated happy birthday.

Fastest Limo

The world's fastest limousine - a 170mph stretch Ferrari - is facing the chop after the supercar maker threatened legal action - for infringing its trademark.

The car, which is rented out for £700 an hour, was created by owner Dan Cawley and former McLaren carbon fibre expert Chris Wright.

It took over a year to convert the £130,000 black 360 Modena, which was bought second hand for £55,000. The project was completed in September 2007. It claimed the Guinness World Record for fastest limousine - at 166mph - six months ago.

Surprisingly, the car returns an average of 15mpg on the motorway and costs only £1,800 a year to comprehensively insure for passenger-carrying duties.

Stunned owner Dan Cawley has been ordered to remove all badges from the 20ft-long, 400bhp limo and told never to modify a Ferrari again.

Lawyers claim that since he cut the 360 Modena in half and stretched it with a 9.5ft section of hand-built carbon fibre, it is no longer a Ferrari. But Dan claims he approached Ferrari UK before he began the £200,000 conversion and was told he could "do what he liked" as the car was his own property.

It is now 20ft long and seats eight people - but has lost little of its performance because it weighs just 160kg more than the original 1390kg car.

The 3.6 litre V8 engine launches the car from 0 to 60mph in under six seconds and has a top speed of around 166mph - just 17mph less than the standard 183mph car.

Dan who is from Manchester, has been given 14 days to remove all prancing horse badges, Ferrari names and 360 Modena symbols. He has also been told never to refer to the car as a Ferrari again, and never to modify another of their cars.

Dan is now taking legal advice to fight the supercar giant. He said: "What kind of precedent does it set when you can't do what you like with your own property?

"We built this as a supercar for the masses, so ordinary people could get the chance to have a ride in something they'd normally only dream of. Now that opportunity could be snatched away from them.

"I'm not being bullied into this. We have to fight on behalf of all limo builders and car tuners out there." The car, which is rented out for £700 an hour, was created by Dan and former McLaren carbon fibre expert Chris Wright.

It took over a year to convert the £130,000 black 360 Modena, which was bought second hand for £55,000. The project was completed in September 2007. It claimed the Guinness World Record for fastest limousine - at 166mph - six months ago.

Surprisingly, the car returns an average of 15mpg on the motorway and costs only £1,800 a year to comprehensively insure for passenger-carrying duties.

Pancake Day

Have we all forgotten about pancake Tuesday or Shrove Tuesday as it is sometimes known? This year it has fallen very early because of the early Easter, but even so this is the first year that none of my fares seemed to know about it. None of the shoppers I picked up from the local supermarkets had bought pancake mix or the traditional lemon juice to squeeze over them.

Now I learn that health and safety rules are beginning to put an end to the traditional sport of pancake racing.
A Cathedral pancake race that is part of a 600-year-old tradition has been stopped because of health and safety rules. The bell at Ripon Cathedral, which has rung at 11am to mark Shrove Tuesday since the 15^th century, has signalled the start of the city’s pancake race for many years.
However, the event, in which children, traders, soldiers and even clergy compete, has been abandoned because of the amount of work needed to carry out risk assessments.

In past years, the event, part of a long tradition of pancake races in Ripon, was likened to a village sports day, a last chance to have fun before the solemn season of Lent.

The race has been growing in popularity and even involved members of 38 Regt Royal Engineers, based in Ripon, who cook pancakes from a field kitchen outside the west front of the cathedral.

“We had hoped to make the pancake race as much of a tradition as the pancake bell and it’s a travesty that it has been killed off."

It’s sad isn’t it, and now surveys tell us that two thirds of people in the country no longer mark the Christian tradition of making pancakes.

Pancakes have featured in cookbooks since 1439. The custom of flipping or tossing them is believed to have started in the 17^th century. They are made from rich ingredients that include eggs and milk, which were used up in households before the 40 days of Lent during which only plain food should be eaten. I don’t know, folk will be telling me that they don’t even know that it’s Ash Wednesday on the day after Shrove Tuesday next eh!

Ex Boy Racer

My young fare got in the cab looking a bit glum and carrying a very expensive looking stereo. "Have you taken the stereo out of your car for safe-keeping?" I asked. He shook his head sadly and replied “no this is all that I've got left of my car” He went on to tell me the story of his “pride and joy, babe magnet" losing it's attraction to the road and ending up crashing into a wall. He was unhurt apart from loss of dignity, and I was impressed that he was man enough to admit that it was his own fault for speeding. He had only had the car for a matter of weeks, and like a jilted lover selling the engagement ring he was going to sell the stereo to another "joy boy" to rid himself of the reminder of his lost love. Just like a cowboy with no horse or a Shepard with no sheep theirs something kinda sad about a boy racer with no wheels.

River Patrol?

It takes a special sort of daftness to do this, I wonder if he would have taken the same chance in his own car. Cheers to Bill for this one.

Game of Chance

Now that the UK government has dropped it's plans for Las Vegas style super casinos, gamblers looking for a high risk thrill would do well to head up to Barrow. Our crazily designed Tesco junction would make even the most hardened gamblers palms sweat and mouth go dry as they play this mad game of chance. Today I was actually on the roundabout coming from Abbey Rd when a driver who was at least twenty yards from the Hollywood Park direction accelerated straight at me. My lady back seat passenger squealed and moved seats away from the target door. I stopped bringing the busy Friday afternoon traffic to a standstill, and then had a heated discussion with the driver. Who insisted that he had the right of way and that" no he shouldn't slow down at the roundabout" and "no he didn't see the give way signs" and "they didn't apply to him anyway cos he was in a hurry" My passenger meanwhile, normally a quiet meek matronly type, rolled down her window and loudly traced the guys ancestry back several centuries, pointing out the female sides lack of morals and the male sides over fondness for livestock. Something has to be done to make this vehicular one armed bandit safer before someone is killed. Now I normally hate speed bumps but the only option I can see apart from scrapping this £1m roulette wheel is to install them on the lead up to this crazy dice with death.

Big Race

Saturday and Grand National fever sweeps the town , with every passenger I pickup asking me "which horse have you backed?" and then after the big race it was "well did you pick the winner?" But as strange as it may seem I didn't have a bet on the race, and the only time I go into a bookies is to help one of our disabled customers up the steps. And even stranger, the only time I've ever backed a horse was for a fare whose leg was in plaster, and then I had to ask someone how to go about it!
I hear it time and time again from some fares, about how they have had a big win and fleeced the bookies, but still it makes them happy for a short while as they get dropped off at their grotty flat, but in the meantime the bookie gets into his Rolls Royce and drives home to his mansion in the certain knowledge that his money will be coming back the next day.
I also notice a lot of folk in the bookies and pubs and clubs feeding the slot machines in an almost hypnotic looking trance. I just can't figure it out, what do they get out of it, the lights flash a couple of times and their money has gone. Myself I would much rather watch my taximeter flashing away, and the numbers steadily increasing, now thats what I call a certain winner.