Make Up

The best way to attract a man is with your eyes. That's why it's so important to have your eye makeup perfectly applied. If it weren't for the excellent application of proper eye makeup, this young lady probably wouldn't get a second look from most men...

Then again, I could be wrong....

I’ve lost count of the lasses and ladies who have gotten into the front passenger seat of the cab and immediately pulled the sun visor down and looked critically at themselves in the vanity mirror. But then despite having already spent hours painting and powdering at home they find fault and decide to try to apply extra paint and filler whilst on the taxi journey. But some wicked little voice in my head always seems to nag at me to plan the route to include every speed hump and pothole in town.

 Then I am drawn by some strange magnetic force into hitting every manhole cover and drain and my brakes and throttle seem to take on a life of their own, braking and accelerating just as the delicate final touches of makeup are applied.

 So if a lass walks into your party or pub with eyes looking like a panda or lips looking like the Joker from Batman she may just have gotten out of my taxi.

Post Haloween

Well it was a quiet Halloween this year with not much trouble due to an increased police presence on the street's. Trouble is that it seems that the local brats have decided to leave the real mischief making until afterwards. For several nights on the trot so far our local taxi drivers have had to put up with eggs, and even worse stones being thrown at cabs in certain parts of town. Don't the parents of these little darlings ever wonder where they are when they go on their nocturnal vandalism sprees. It may seem like fun to these kids but when driver's are out there doing a public service and trying to make a living it's no joke. Perhaps the police should like the little thugs consider Halloween as a week and not just the one night.

Spot the Spook

As usual click to enlarge

Pumpkins Tale

This the strange tale from a pumpkin.

Monster Weekend

Sunday morning and the clocks went back last night and so it's a bit lighter, but of course we will be paying for that at the other end of the day. Whatever they do with the clocks they can't squeeze any more daylight out of a day at this time of year. When the clocks go forward I usually pick up a few fares who are an hour late for work as they have "forgotten to change their clocks" but strangely I have never picked anyone up going to work an hour early when the clocks go back. With lot's of clever marketing Halloween seems to be getting as big as Christmas over here now, at one time it was called mischief night or duck apple night and instead of pumpkins hollowed out turnips were used as lanterns. Pumpkins! now that is clever marketing we import boatloads of the things, but all we do is hollow them out and throw the contents out because nobody wants to eat it. And now instead of one night the celebrations are lasting for several days with the grown ups using this weekend as an excuse to party, this morning all I seemed to pick up were disheveled devils and vanquished vampires, all with monster hangovers.

Spookytours

Well we dared to take the Spooky Tour of Barrow's darkened Gothic town hall and along with the thirty or so other thrill seekers we really enjoyed the experience. Barrow's eerily rambling town hall must surely be one of the best settings you could wish for this ghostly walk sprinkled with tongue in cheek dramatics by the excellant Crashbang productions . Only two children were spooked but they were quickly guided to the brightly lit banqueting hall. All the kids were given a generous goodie bag at the end of the tour and a certificate which poignantly had been presigned by the late Mayor Bill Crosthwaite who tragically died after collapsing at the rehearsals for the tour the previous night. But of course you always get one don't you, we overheard one moron saying he had expected more for his money, but as my ten year old daughter said "it's all for charity, what do they expect a theme park?".