Virgin boss Richard Branson has today unveiled plans to turn part of the Sellafield nuclear waste fool plant into a theme park. He spoke today in glowing terms of this, his biggest challenge up to date to turn this heavily contaminated eyesore into a world class fun palace. Complete with it's own casino, health spa, and top class restaurant serving dishes such as Gamma and egg he is hoping to attract rich visitors from the Irish coast and Norway. Some reports say that he has already contacted local farmers with a view to buying unusual animals for the zoo he hopes to have stocked with six legged sheep and two headed cows etc;
Local political activist Jim Hazelnut, who has been offered the post of media spokesman and chief herdsman said today "Bring it on I am radiantly glowing with happiness this will really brighten things up round here, and give me loads more photo opportunity's "